The wonderful Heather Ann talks about her experiences and “Tease Texting” in this latest podcast episode!

We love women of all shapes and sizes (except fat) – and we’ve got a bangin’ blonde bombshell who’s a MASTER at tease texting and opening the (bedroom) door to a woman’s heart, but she’s specializes in separated men.  That’s right, Miss Heather Havenwood works with separated men, men who have been BURNED in the past, and are back in the game.  She’s chillin with us tonight on Skype, and boy do we have some great questions and nuggets of knowledge from Heather Havenwood, owner of OnlyDateYoungerWomen.com and DatingTriggers.com

Heather Havenwood is a Texas girl turned dating coach and extremely successful businesswomen with some awesome texting tactics from her system called, “Dating Up: How to Date Younger Women Even if you’re Fat, Ugly, or dead broke.”  She’s also an extremely successful businesswoman (made over a million without sales!) and a bangin blonde bombshell from the state/country of Texas.  Who WOULDN’T want to date her?  She’s had her experiences with the lowliest of lows, and has helped hundreds of men who have been BURNED in the past like separated men.  Heather Havenwood is THE expert to go to for dating younger women and texting any woman right into the bedroom.

For me and Ozzie, we dedicate this particular podcast to guys who have been BURNED in the past, the guys who have been in that crappy relationship that didn’t work out.  To all of you separated men out there, this podcast is created specifically for you to get your love life back in order.  Ozzie and myself have been in plenty of horrendous relationships in the past, and we wouldn’t want to wish that upon anyone.  We’re glad Heather Havenwood is with us because she’s got all of the secrets to dating younger women and healing the wounded hearts of separated men.  We here at Alpha Lifestyle know it sucks, and we’re here to mend those scars and get you the girl you’ve been looking for.

When it comes to dating younger women, Heather says you need to speak their form of communication, which is texting.  One little tidbit she uses is called “tease texting,” which  are little bite sized texts that show you’re thinking about her.  A good example of a tease text is:

“Hey pretty girl, how’s your day going?”

Personally, I started experimenting with this a few times with a couple of the girls I picked up in Las Vegas, and DAMN!  IT TOTALLY WORKS!  Now it’s not just with the girls I met out in bars and clubs, but girls I’ve already been seeing have been getting much more attached to me.  My closest girl, Jenn, told me, “You’re just popping into my life, even if it’s just a couple of characters in a text…  You’re just popping into my world and making it just a little more fun and ridiculous every time you text me.”

If any girl says that she hates texting…  She’s outright lying.  It’s like saying you’re a girl on the internet, you’re obviously lying (and probably a dude.  If it’s a 13 year old kid, it’s probably an undercover police officer).  Take it from Heather Havenwood – women LOVE to text.  Especially in the younger generation, texting is extremely important as it the staple form of communication between 14-16 year olds.

One of the best topics of discussion we had with Heather was the progression from text, to phone, to actively dating.  When a woman gives you her number, she is opening the gate for you to enter, but some girls like Heather don’t like it when guys immediately call (this is especially true for younger women).  There needs to be a progression to get there.  It’s like meeting someone for the first time, asking them to marry you, having sex, then asking them what their name is.  COMPLETELY WRONG!  You don’t start the alphabet with J and then go back to A.  You don’t start your interaction with a woman by trying to have a deep conversation over the phone for an hour.

As stated earlier, start off with texting!  It’s a low investment and a quick, convenient, and effective form of communication.  Start tease texting that girl, pop into her life for a second and GIVE VALUE while teasing her.  After you establish good rapport with her via text, you can start calling her.  Heather Havenwood HATES it when a guy calls her right off the bat wanting to have a 2 hour conversation over the phone.  That’s not how the progression works.  I know that lots of women today screen their calls and will immediately ignore your call.  Begin with TEASE TEXTING like in Heather’s Dating Up program.

Ozzie and I took a quick look at Heather’s Dating Up system – It’s totally designed for separated men and guys who have gotten extremely burned in the past.  It covers a ton of excellent material from the initial meet to the first date, and she also have a large library of interviews with other dating gurus.  Keep in mind that Dating Up is designed for successful and ambitious men, so if you’re still in college and don’t quite have your career planted in the ground right now, wait off on the program.  If you’ve been out of school, have a degree, are an older man (35+), want to date younger women, and are experiencing some trouble in your dating life, then grab your copy of Dating Up today.  Heather Havenwood really knows her stuff.  Ozzie and myself completely approve of her system.  It totally works.  Don’t believe me?  Check it out here.

If you want to get a hold of Heather, check out her website right here.  As usual, you can contact myself or Ozzie R at the contact us page at the bottom of the page here.  Send us your questions and requests for speakers.  The Alpha Lifestyle podcast would not be successful if it weren’t for you listeners out there, and we’re really excited to have you guys join us every Friday for our show.

Live the Alpha Lifestyle!

Ben J and Ozzie R

I hate that thing you’re wearing…

Those clothes suck.

I am the master of my own reality.

Arash Dibazar, master pick up artist, martial artist, and production guru extraordinaire is on our podcast today, and there’s few words that can sum up his view on life – RAW UNFILTERED HONESTY.  He’s the master of his own world, takes no crap from anyone, and strongly believes he’s the best at whatever he chooses to be the best at.  His inner game, mindset, and perspective on life automatically makes him the ALPHA MALE in any sort of situation.  He’s always alpha, all the time.  Even Ozzie and myself felt a little overwhelmed by the presence and tone of voice.  The man knows what he wants, and he’ll do anything to get it.

While his appearance can be a bit frightening, overbearing, and a bit strange, he doesn’t care what you think (Honey Badger don’t give a shit!).  He does it to stand out against the mainstream, be different, and carve his own path, because he loves it, and he only accepts the best from people whether it be his students, co-workers, or the many women he’s dating (simultaneously).

When we first brought Arash onto the podcast, we were immediately impressed by how well he spoke and his articulate points that haven’t really been covered by the seduction community.  These points include: changing how you view your world, not giving a crap about rejection, and specializing, not generalizing.  Now we’ve had previous speakers who have said to increase your value by learning new skills and being a jack of all trades.  While there is good to having many skills, we’re glad to have different views and ones that contrast what we’ve had before, and Arash says, “Master what’s important.”

Rather than be a clumsy jack of all trades, learn to specialize in what you really care about and what is truly important to you.  “Find what matter to you and master it.  Master what’s important.”  Arash Dibazar has got more than just the romantic part of his life mastered.  He’s the brutally honest tough love instructor, without the love, and when you work with him, you’re bound to get results.

Brutal honesty is one of the key parts of Arash Dibazar’s style of teaching.  If he doesn’t like you, he’ll tell you.  If he thinks you’re a complete idiot, he’ll let you know one way or another.  Whatever it is that you’re doing wrong, Arash will jump on the problem right away and tell you how to fix it, and he’s not shy about it at all.

Arash is not just a dating coach, but a master martial artist and entrepreneur.  He runs his own company, “Seductive Instinct,” with himself and several employees, does his own dating boot camps, and also has his own production studio.  The man is constantly surrounded by super hot girls.  Take a look at his website for christ’s sake, he’s really living the Alpha Lifestyle!

An important aspect of what Arash continually explored was the idea of Inner Game, or basically, everything that happens in your head.  Now let’s be frank for a second here:

• Everyone has their insecurities
• Everyone has something they’re afraid of
• Everyone has some degree of fearing rejection
• Everyone has baggage and demons from their past

But how do you conquer these things?  Arash obviously admits he as insecurities and things he’s afraid of, yes, it’s true.  Even myself and Ozzie R have our doubts, but do we show it?  OF COURSE NOT!  What I liked most about Arash’s thoughts on rejection is this little nugget:

“If you reject me, that’s fine.  You’re just one more person on this planet I don’t have to care about.”  

We all have an ego, and a reputation to uphold, but when you stop wearing your heart on your sleeve and stop getting so emotionally invested into the idea of rejection, it makes you free to express yourself and the liberty to do whatever you feel, rather than worrying about what other people think all the time.  Personally, I like to call it the, “Art of Not Giving a Fuck.”

Arash is a no-holds-barred teacher.  He pushes his students extremely hard and is ready to tackle any crappy mindset a student gives him.  Arash’s mindset is:

• I am the best
• I am the master
• No one can defeat me
• People who are insignificant or unaccomplished have no place in my life.
• I am the master of my world.
• This world is my world

I know what some of you guys are thinking, “Arash sounds like a pompous overconfident dick!” but on the contrary, he’s nothing like that.  His speech, tone of voice, timbre, pitch, and style of speaking and articulation is done in a way that exudes extreme confidence and most importantly, COMMAND PRESENCE, one of the biggest topics we covered tonight.

Command Presence is one of the biggest things Ozzie R and myself cover in our ABCs of Attraction framework.  It’s about the ability to command a room, get everyone to notice you, and get attention and immediate respect from those around you at the drop of a pin. Think back in your life to a time where you met someone who had such incredible undying confidence and had a power to command in a completely socially acceptable manner.  He or she may have said anything and you immediately complied without even second guessing yourself.  This is command presence in its most basic and simple form.  Want to learn how to train yourself to have this power?  This is the podcast for you!

We’ve been privileged to have so many awesome speakers on our podcasts, and Arash Dibazar with his brutal honesty is just what we all needed to hear (not necessarily what we wanted to hear!)  You can check out Arash’s website at http://www.seductiveinstinct.com – and contact him at arash@seductiveinstinct.com if you want to learn more about him or ask him questions.  As for Ozzie R and myself, you can use the “Contact Us” page at the top bar.

Take the brutal honesty to heart, and man the fuck up!

Ben J

Clarisse's signature rose and symbol of her S&M nature and expertise

Chains, whips, leather masks, girls screaming in the euphoric agony that is BDSM… Boy do we have a podcast for you guys today!

Today, we interview Clarisse Thorn, a best selling author on Amazon and close personal friend of mine from my amateur pick up artist adventures in good ol’ Chicago, Illinois. We met while JT Tran was giving his speech to college students at University of Chicago in Hyde Park, and as she was writing her book on pick up artists, she chased us around like crazy, curious of the lifestyle and craft. After the whole chase and adventure concluded, Clarisse remained a close personal friend of mine.

I’m glad to have her on our podcast today, as we talk about a topic of a forbidden, sexual, and hardcore fantasy escapade – S&M, or sadism and masochism.

Author, writer, speaker, S&M pro-sex feminist, Clarisse Thorn is considered one of the top experts in BDSM, S&M, and pro-sex feminism. She has been featured on Post Masculine Radio, Psychology Today, and has several excellent books on Amazon, including a few best sellers like, “Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser“,“The S&M Feminist: Best Of Clarisse Thorn,” and her newly released title, “Switch Seductress: An S&M Romance.”

Now I’ve always been into handcuffs, ropes, and tying my girls to the bed, but slapping, chains, and whips are completely new to me. Believe it or not, lots of women actually ENJOY the act of playing the submissive. We’ve heard of fantasies of role-playing, the dirty nurse, the nasty librarian, and even the rape fantasy. Want to learn how to have each of these fantasies in a completely acceptable manner and not get thrown in jail, arrested, or be called a creep? We’ve got the podcast for you! Take note that acts of sadism, fantasy role play in whatever situation chosen is NOT considered sexual assault or sexual harassment as long as there is consent between both parties (or all parties involved, if you’re into that!)

Whips, bondage gear, ropes, and handcuffs sprawl throughout your dungeon of sexual intent, and your girlfriend is waiting… What do you do first? Slap her around silly? Screw her brains out while whipping her until her back turns red? Throw her on the bed and choke her? What’s Clarisse Thorn have to say about this? NONE OF THE ABOVE is acceptable to do first. In this episode of the Alpha Lifestyle podcast, Clarisse Thorn talks about the beginning of S&M, how to get started with your own S&M fantasies, and even how to have a conversation about the topic in the first place without freaking out your partner. She even talks about her back-story of how she first thought it was dirty, terrible, and absolutely wrong and how later on Clarisse Thorn had a change of heart, and explored it all the way, loving every second of it.

The first thing Clarisse says to do with your partner when you want to initiate S&M is to talk about it. The most important thing to have when this is taking place is consent. Consent is the important component of the S&M vehicle, and you can’t just start beating the crap out of your partner without their consent! If you’re new to the scene and just want to learn more about it, Clarisse talks about fetish maps and finding your hidden local dungeons where you can meet other S&M fans and quite possibly find a date! With the use of consent, you can create any sick and twisted fantasy with your significant other(s) and recreate any sort of role play you want, whether it be a boss-secretary forbidden relationship, or even a rape fantasy – as its even mentioned in our podcast. As long as you have consent with your significant other(s) and communicate well, you’ll be green to go on just about anything you guys agree to do. Just imagine it, doing ANYTHING you want to another person with their consent in a sexual nature… She can play nurse, or she can play librarian, or secretary! The possibilities are endless!

The benefits of S&M are not just great sex and blowing steam off as a dominant. Clarisse has a strong stance on improving communications between couples with S&M, and also getting closer on a different level than just intimacy. S&M builds a lot of trust and compliance with couples, and is an excellent way to learn how to communicate with one another. Trusting that your partner will stop when they say the safe word, or trusting that they are fine with acting out a fantasy builds a deep level or rapport with that person. Even better, you can take the fantasies farther and farther every time, and make it even dirtier than the last one. S&M can surely be a way to spice up your sex life, and not just let it wither away with plain old vanilla ice cream sex!

Now there’s a ton of misconceptions when it comes to S&M, and Clarisse Thorn delves into lots of these, how S&M is actually more common than you think, and how you can get started introducing a little bit more kink into your relationship with a simple trip to the ice cream shop and having a conversation. Clarisse has found several great ways to get into the conversation of beginning a kinky relationship and putting S&M into their lives slowly, including a way to get a template on how to have a difficult conversation with someone. She has some absolutely brilliant information for you guys, and you’re getting it, absolutely free!

As always, we love making these podcasts so you guys have great solid information that you can rely on. If you want to talk to Clarisse Thorn directly, go check out her Twitter and blog at http://www.clarissethorn.com. Check out her awesome books on Amazon like “Confessions of a Pickup Artist Chaser,” “The S&M Feminist: Best Of Clarisse Thorn,” and her newly released title, “Switch Seductress: An S&M Romance,” all available on Kindle.

You can e-mail her at Clarisse.thorn@gmail.com and as always, the infamous Ozzie R and Ben J are always available on the “Contact Us” form at the main navigation bar on the top of the page. Send us your questions, love, and hate mail, and we’ll read it.

Enjoy it!
Ben J

It’s only been a couple weeks since we’ve launched Alpha Lifestyle, and our inboxes are already flooded like crazy…  All I can say is thanks for all your awesome questions, comments, and wonderful mail we’ve been getting from all of you guys about lifestyle.  A ton of the questions we got were in regards to having an attractive lifestyle and attraction switches.  We’ve got great questions on having an attractive lifestyle and attraction switches in this podcast, and Ozzie and I can’t wait to give you this information!

I mean, GUYS have an attraction switch. What about women? NOPE!

In this episode of the Alpha Lifestyle Podcast, we talk about attraction switches, what they are, and in reality, how they don’t even truly exist.  There is no switch to a woman’s heart, and you can’t just believe there’s a magical little phrase you can say to get a girl instantly horny.  The biggest problem between men and women is that men think women think like men and vice versa.  Attraction switches are a common myth in the realm of seduction, and it’s much better to look at living an attractive lifestyle rather than discuss attraction switches.  We talk about this much more in depth in the episode.

We also talk a little bit about day game topics.  One of the good questions we got was about how to transition into comfort.  We give you our patented response which is honest, direct, and blows through any sort of bull crap she’s thinking about,

“All bullshit aside, I came over here to get to know you better.  What’s your story?”

This is a 100% genuine and honest method to quickly transfer into comfort building and to start to get to know the girl better.  We also talk about the 2 questions girls will always ask you, and you need to be ready to answer these questions.

Other questions we were asked are:

• How do you know you’ve been in comfort for too long? – When the conversation is starting to die out.  Get the sexy on, you’re already attractive, pull the trigger!
• How do we hit a woman’s attraction switches? – There’s no trigger…  Attraction switches are just a myth.  It’s more about living an attractive lifestyle.
• What are some ways to get others attracted to you? – Storytelling and more!  Talk about your attractive lifestyle and share stories, in essence, these are the real attraction switches.
• What do I do when a girl says “I want to be treated like a princess?” over text message? – She wants you to become an orbiter and kiss her ass.  Set up a date and blow her mind away without kissing her ass.
• What’s the best way to break up with a girl you just don’t like? – Easy, be honest.
• I need a wingman!  What do I do? – Find like-minded people that are good friends.
• How do I turn a one night stand into a relationship? -Ahhh, about that…
• Where can I find more intelligent women?  During the daytime of course!

Questions? We got em answered for ya!

We wanted to answer more questions, but we just didn’t have enough time to answer the thousands of questions left in our inbox.  Other topics we delved into this particular episode is honesty, one sided relationships, having friends and meeting like-minded people, and a ton more.  In addition to questions, Ozzie and myself reveal a little bit of our back story of what we were like before we even got into the entire dating coach adventure, including a few little gems like, “Often times, you can’t change people.  In fact, it’s rude to try.”  We have a lot of emphasis on lifestyle in this podcast.  If you want to live the true Alpha Lifestyle, then you’ve got to listen to this podcast!

Ozzie and I have an absolute blast whenever we create these podcasts, and we hope you enjoy the Alpha Lifestyle Podcast.  Keep sending us your questions here.

Thanks for listening guys!

Ben J and Ozzie R

Is it possible or ideal to live an Alpha Lifestyle in LONG TERM RELATIONSHIPS with just one girl?  I mean, come on, ONE GIRL!?

If there’s anyone who has a love for multiple women out there, it’s myself and my boy Ozzie R, but to some people, they don’t want to be actively dating for their entire lives.  They want a family and kids, or a long term partner to share their experiences with for the rest of their lives.  In all honesty, lots of my students soon find that after getting loads of sexual success with women, they get sick of it.  They’re tired of being treated like a piece of meat, and they want long term relationships with a beautiful, intelligent, and graceful female.

Will USED to be a ladies man, but not anymore. He's onto bigger and better things: Marriage!

Now understand these long term relationship-worthy girls are hard to find, but for our good friend William Lee, also known as “Better Asian Man,” he’s just proposed to his long term girlfriend, and she’s official his fiancée.

Years and years ago, William was about to move back to Taiwan to date some fresh off the boat Taiwanese village girl.  He had given up on dating in America, regardless of having a slick high paying Wall Street job and living financially successful, but he wasn’t happy about it.  He had been constantly rejected by women, and even worse, rejected and dejected by his own FRIENDS.  You heard me right, William used to be the pity friend.  These toxic characters would invite William along just to make fun of him, and make themselves feel better.   If anything, William was living the opposite of the Alpha Lifestyle.

One day, Will gets a call from one of his close friends, “DUDE!  I got laid on the third night of this sick dating bootcamp.  You HAVE to take it!  You will NOT regret it!”  William contemplates the idea.  He has two choices – move back to Taiwan and pick up a village girl, or take this bootcamp.  He figures he’s got nothing to lose (never having been in a long term relationships himself), so he took the bootcamp, and he went all the way, 110%.  The guest speaker from the first podcast, Johnny Wolf,” was William’s teacher, mentor, and friend, while the legendary JT “Asian Playboy” Tran will be ORDAINING William’s wedding.

You can still live an Alpha Lifestyle when you're married. It's NOT just about banging girls or getting married!

When William took his dating skills bootcamp, he decided to go all out.  He bought every single book, every DVD, watched every program suggested by Johnny and JT.  He did all of the pre-bootcamp preparation homework, and on the first night, William had a one night stand.  Johnny and JT were ecstatic about William’s success when he saw him leave with a gorgeous girl for some adult fun, but an hour later, William returns to the club…  The instructors ran to his side and comforted him.

“Dude, it’s OK!  We didn’t tell you how to deal with Last Minute Resistance, it’s perfectly ok!  You’re doing great!” Said JT and Johnny, but William replied,

“No guys, it’s OK.  I had sex with her.  You guys told me I had to talk to 10 different women tonight, and she was the sixth girl I talked to.  I have four more girls to talk to.”

If anything, this is the attitude of a true winner, someone who wants to WIN and do something amazing with their life.  From then on, William became a legend in the ABCs of Attraction circle, and ended up instructing and helping out on various programs throughout the world.  After banging a million girls around the world, William found that one special girl he enjoyed spending the most time with, and he formed a lasting and loving long term relationship with her.  He stayed with her and then when the moment of opportunity came, he seized it and popped the question.  Now William is happier than ever with his beautiful fiancee.

In this episode’s podcast, William comes onto the show and talks about what it’s like getting engaged, being in long term relationships, and how to manage the relationship.    William’s breadth of knowledge includes a ton of great topics and bits of information about

• Knowing if she’s the right girl
• Managing the relationship
• Compromising when you and your significant other disagree on stuff, even the smallest things
• Actively dating versus exclusive relationships

Understand that William used to be in the same position as you.  Think about what’s going on in your life right now.  Do you:

• Have friends that constantly rip on you and make you feel bad?
• Feel like you have no escape from being single?
• Look in the mirror every morning, and hate yourself?

This situation wasn’t far off from what William was experiencing, and we have some great information from one of the most inspirational characters I have ever met.

Want to ask Will a question?  Hit him up at editor@betterasianman.com

If you have questions you want to send to Alpha Lifestyle, be it on long term relationships, one night stands, or getting threesomes, hit us up using our Contact Form!

It’s Ben J here, and I’m hanging out with Ozzie Rios, “The Latino Gentlemen,” in our next episode of the official Alpha Lifestyle podcast dedicated to the first date. In this episode, we tackle the ignorant and whimsically derailed idea of the first date which mass media has shoved down our throats. We talk about why dinner and a movie is a terrible idea, and who should pay for the bill.

Lots of the information in here is covered by an upcoming eBook by me called, “First Date Formula,” soon to be published by ABCs of Attraction. Ozzie and I talk about some of the absolute WORST dates we’ve been on, some of the BEST dates we’ve charmed beautiful women with, and much more.  If you want some more info on it, throw me a friend request on Facebook and ask me anything.  I am willing to work with anyone who puts in the time and effort if they want to learn all about how to get laid on the first date.

In the standard dating and attraction boot camp curriculum I teach with Ozzie R, we talk about how one night stands aren’t really your prime source of lays.  It’s actually the first date!  While yes, one night stands are totally awesome and great for getting your dick wet, 90% of the time it is a logistical NIGHTMARE.  She may have been the driver, or is holding the keys for someone, or maybe she’s still living with her ex-boyfriend and she’s having a girls’ night out.  What if she lives on the other side of town?  What if you’re visiting town and are sharing a hotel room with a buddy?  LOGISTICAL NIGHTMARE!  Screw the one night stand!  Get her number, and get in the pants after a first date!

We don’t live in a dating society anymore.  That died alongside the parachute pants era.  Today, thanks to the incredulous amount of virtual connections available, we are a hangout and hookup society.  People hook up after hanging out with each other, after partying, etc.  Boys and girls are getting down after the first date, in fact, a recent study shows that 57% of WOMEN prefer first date sex.  Crazy, right?  Well it’s backed up by science, and if you’re not taking girls to the bedroom and giving them the time of their life after an incredible date experience, then you’re doing it WRONG!

In this episode, Ozzie and I joke around quite a bit as we explore just about EVERYTHING you need to know about the first date. Keep in mind that we specifically designed this podcast for intermediate and advanced students, but we highly encourage you beginners to save this podcast to your hard drive, or bookmark this page (Ctrl/Command+D) so you don’t forget to check it out.

I’ve only been living in Los Angeles for a year and after adventuring, testing, and exploring this city, and I’ve been able to get a 90% sex rate with this date. Keep in mind, I’ve kept the same basic format for this date, and it works for just about every single girl. Most of the time, I don’t even get LMR. The girl is BEGGING me to take her back to my apartment for an immediate romp in the sack.  This date formula I’ve assembled has consistently gotten me laid.

We even break down the entire date from location to location.  There’s no figuring out what to do here.  This podcast if anything is your cheat sheet to getting laid on a date.  Listen to it, follow it, do it, make the magic happen and seduce a gorgeous girl you met today!  You’re probably thinking, “Oh snap, how do I do it?  How do I make it happen?”  Don’t fret young padawan.  We know your first date skills aren’t quite up to par, so now we’re here to fix it for you.

On the ABCs of Attraction forum, I posted a quick overview of my “Infamous Gun Range” date, from head to toe with even a few tips for decorating your home and readying your man cave for a beautiful girl to come in just begging to be seduced. We also talk about environment and experience and how I use the environment with our own presence to collaboratively seduce whoever agrees to go on this fantastic date with me.

In fact, this infamous outing of mine landed me a date with a Hollywood TV celebrity, who I was able to keep in consistent contact to this very day. This long legged girl told me that my date was the most relaxed, interesting, and adventurous date she’s ever been on in her life, and she’s been on at least one hundred more dates than I have! She was sick of the fancy dinners, yachts, upscale hotels, and wanted something fun and casual.

I took her to shoot some GUNS.  The adrenaline rush kicked in, she loved every second of it and had so much fun she forgot it was even a date.  Screw dinner parties and expensive yachts.  We did something FUN and ADVENTUROUS, and even better, I gave that girl an experience.  This experience she will NEVER forget for the rest of her life.  Later down the road, she told me that I have a special place in her heart and she’s going to love me forever.  When I look back at it, I’m always going to have a special place for her too, and it’s not just in the bedroom

Ozzie talks about one of his very best dates where he takes a girl hiking, and fools around with her on the hiking trail. We also solve the dilemma of, “who pays for what?” We’ve laid out the entire framework from start to finish, and best of all, the podcast is entirely FREE! Plus, get a sneak peek at my new ebook coming out on first dates. We have all of the answers for you in this week’s Alpha Lifestyle Official Podcast.

Pro fighter, professional dating coach, fitness expert, and a guy who is probably living the lifestyle you could only dream about – Johnny Wolf resides in Koh Tao, Thailand, training as a professional Muay Thai Kickboxer and Mixed Martial Arts fighter.  At the same time, he teaches SCUBA diving classes (in English and Chinese) at an all inclusive resort in Borneo, teaches boys how to be men and get the girl of their dreams, and way too many more awesome things to list here.  He’s the founder of the original Southern California Lair and the guy who helped co-create the largest pick up artist gathering and convention in the world.  If anyone out there is living the true Alpha Lifestyle, it’s Johnny Wolf

Best part?  We’ve got him in the studio tonight as our special guest for you guys!  We took a lot of time and effort in figuring out who to bring on for our first podcast for you eager listeners out there, and the no-brainer choice was Johnny Wolf.  He’s the guy that all the girls want, and all the guys want to be.  I remember way back when I first started teaching at ABCs of Attraction, I taught a bootcamp in Las Vegas with this guy, and by god he’s got the most solid and Alpha skills that I’ve ever seen in my entire time as a professional dating coach.  Every girl this guy talked to melted into his arms.  Every guy he talked to was immediately befriended and stood by his commanding presence.  He even stuck to the “bro-code” and handled the “not-so-attractive girl” like a total boss in order to buy our student more time with a bangin’ hot Filipino girl.

Johnny calls himself a retired Pick up Artist, because he’s been in the game for over ten years, and has recently turned 31.  He’s traveled all the way to our studio here in sunny Los Angeles, CA just to speak about how to live the true Alpha Lifestyle just for you listeners out there, so get your pen and paper ready, because Johnny Wolf has some incredible pearls of wisdom to give you guys tonight.  Johnny first speaks to us about his main field of game, which is none other than lifestyle game.  He gives an excellent explanation on what it is about lifestyle game that makes it attractive to women, and how to make it happen.  Johnny had the hardest time with this in his younger days, as he had to go through some totally difficult identities he was experimenting with, from SCUBA diving instructor to MMA fighter, he had to figure out what his identity was, and what sort of character he is attempting to portray that is not only a fun life to live, but also naturally attractive to women.  Johnny Wolf is basically giving you all of the answers you need in order to live the Alpha Lifestyle that you’ve been DREAMING of, so why WOULDN’T you listen to this podcast?

After talking about Identity and lifestyle game, Johnny spends a lot of time about an absolute important (and my personal favorite part) about lifestyle game, a DOMINANT SEX LIFE.  You’ve got to be dominant in your relationships with your girls.  Johnny Wolf explained having a dominant sex life best here, when he talked about waiting for his girl to get dressed to go to dinner with friends.  Johnny Wolf’s sex drive is unbelievable, and how he dominantes his girls in bed is he grabs the girl, before she can get out the door, all dolled up looking like a million bucks,

“Baby, you are so sexy, I can’t help myself.”  Johnny Wolf grabs the girl, throws her onto the bed, it’s a naughty terrible thing to do, as she had spent tons of time getting her hair done, finishing her make up, but she wants it SO BAD and Johnny exudes an extremely dominant sexual energy that his girl can’t HELP but fuck his brains out and heads out to dinner, hair messed up, makeup smeared all over, she’s struggling to walk, but she remembers why she looks messed up, and she LOVES every second of it.  Johnny Wolf KNOWS how to have a real dominant sex life, and he knows his girls can’t help themselves, but BEG to be thrown onto the bed and fucked senselessly.

If you really want to hear more of Johnny’s incredible adventures, and absolutely wild Alpha Lifestyle, be sure to check out his blog at The Social Secrets.  Johnny Wolf has a long and rich history of lays, threesomes, stripper and pornstar girlfriends, and even his infamous 45 second one night stand at his off the hook birthday party (where EVERY guy hooked up, and there were at LEAST 2 girls to every guy!)

Ozzie and myself take a good chuck of time to interview and pick Johnny Wolf’s brain, but keep in mind that this blog post only has just a tiny slice of the amazing and incredible information Johnny has for you all tonight, so what are you waiting for?  Check out the podcast, listen in, and soak up all the information about lifestyle game, what it is to live an Alpha Lifestyle, and start taking the steps to becoming the incredible man you were destined to be.  From myself, Ozzie, and Johnny Wolf, we hope you enjoy our FIRST podcast.

Ben J

P.S – We’re planning on releasing these podcasts every single WEEK for you guys.  That’s right, EVERY WEEK, a brand new podcast with myself and Ozzie discussing the topics YOU want to hear about!  If you have a suggestion for a topic, throw us a line at ben.j@abcofattraction.com or ozzie@abcofattraction.com – We love to hear from our listeners and we’re absolutely ecstatic about starting up this brand new podcast for you guys.  You can also find me on Facebook and send me  or Ozzie a quick message or question regarding Alpha Lifestyle.  We plan on doing some mailbag podcasts soon, so don’t be shy, send us questions!

Ben J and Ozzie R Officially Take Over Alpha Lifestyle!

Come check out Ben J and Ozzie R in the BRAND NEW Alpha Lifestyle Podcast, COMING SOON!

Alpha Lifestyle is officially under brand new management- Say hello to Ben J and Ozzie R, two ordinary guys who just happen to be Dating Coaches for ABCs of Attraction.

Ben J - Lifestyle Afficianado and Professional Dating Coach

Ben J – hailing from the windy city of Chicago, IL is a professional dating coach now living in Los Angeles, CA.  He enjoys SCUBA Diving, Skydiving, volunteering, shooting guns, working out, and the whole nine yards when it comes to being extreme and living a full and vibrant lifestyle.  Ben J is also a follower of Tim Ferriss’s 4 Hour Work Week, and utilizes the concepts of income automation and more in order to fund his out-of-this-word adventures.

Personally trained by the infamous JT Tran and close friend Gareth Jones, Ben J’s specialty in the dating realm is first dates, with his very own format having a 90% success rate for first date sex and students raving about the incredible results they’ve had. Ben J’sfirst date has been tried and tested from crazy club girls, cougars, college girls, and even an A-list TV celebrity who he is currently dating.

When Ben J isn’t taking girls out on incredible first dates, he’s usually playing video games or diving in the ocean hunting crab and lobster.

Ozzie R - Day Game master and Fitness Experimentalist

Smooth, suave, and with a style that kills, Ozzie R is one of the original coaches for ABCs of Attraction and is considered one of the masters of Day Game, whether it be on a college campus, grocery store, or the street.  Ozzie has been featured on Fuel TV for his day game antics and always dresses to kill when he’s out and about talking to gorgeous babes.  If he’s not showing his killer GQ style, he’s in his Gi, kicking ass Grappling and studying Brazilian Jujitsu.

Born and raised in Los Angeles, CA, Ozzie was already a troublemaker with the ladies getting his first girlfriend in 6th grade, and caught fingering girls behind the candy shop.  After getting his degree in college, Ozzie put on his big boy pants and took the dating coach world by storm as a personal wingman to William aka “Better Asian Man,” JT Tran, Johnny Wolf, and many other dating coaches.

When Ozzie isn’t busy seducing beautiful women or teaching day game students, he’s watching UFC, hitting the gym, or eating Ben J’s freshly hunted crab and lobster.

Ben J and Ozzie R want to give you guys a BIG welcome to the ALPHA LIFESTYLE website.  In fact, we’re so excited about getting this site that we’re starting a brand spankin’ new Podcast with FREE information on how to live the lifestyle of your dreams.  In fact, we want our listeners to succeed so we’ll be hosting mailbag podcasts from time to time answering your questions over the air so you can truly start living an Alpha Lifestyle.

Check out our first podcast episode coming very soon – HOW TO GET A GIRLFRIEND, along with learning a little bit more about Ben J and Ozzie R.

Find out more on how they got mixed up into the crazy Pick Up Artist Community, got headhunted by Asian Playboy, and more in our “About Us” Section.

What Women Find Attractive

What women find attractive varies depending on her personality and taste which is good news for you, because generally speaking there really is someone for everyone. Rather than try and become something or someone you are not, by enhancing your best and also unique qualities you can become the most attractive version of you. This gives a rest in who you are which communicates outwardly as confidence which is extremely attractive to women.

What Women Find Attractive

Now while beauty is in the eye of the beholder, there is no denying many people could make some big improvements on the image they present to the world, and on their personality flaws. Yes, we all have our flaws, but in the dating scene apathy and laziness will leave you sidelined, lonely and single. Deciding you can change and work on or improve those things you don’t like about yourself is empowering. After you make the effort in a few areas it will become second nature and in any case, this is the kind of attitude you need for a successful long term relationship.

The outside is what everyone sees first, so that is the best place to begin. What women find attractive in looks varies greatly. Generally women do like height and muscles. Other physical qualities include a great smile and the eyes.  The eyes because they are the window to the soul and give a woman an intuitive feel for whether you are open or more guarded in personality. Obviously height is not something you can do much about, although you could gain an inch with special soles on your shoes. With online dating it is not as important. But be encouraged you can make up for a lack of height with muscles which anyone can develop with the right workout and nutrition program.

More than physical qualities your personality will be the most attractive part of you to a woman. If you are funny and can put a woman at ease, make her laugh, make her feel valued and that you really hear her when she talks, qualities like your height will rapidly fade in importance. Looks are just the drawing card, but you need to have depth of character and a great personality to be able to establish a longer term connection.

Now, dress sense matters to a woman. If you really don’t have a clue,  show her you are open for her input and guiding hand in this area, as women find that very attractive. You can never go wrong with a modern trendy look. If you need help ask. Take some girlfriends shopping (platonic friends), or ask your girlfriend to accompany you and ask what she likes to see you dressed in. A lot of women have great taste for clothing. But if you can’t find someone whose opinion you value, sales assistants should be able to give you some good tips and direction. If you really need help hire someone for a makeover and style over. Fashion magazines can also be a good point of reference for the latest trends and give you some new ideas.

Keep in mind never take your mother shopping for clothes. It is hugely unattractive to a woman to find out your mom buys your clothes. A woman wants to see you are a man and not a mommy’s boy and would also like to think she has some influence over you clothing choices.

Displaying different sides of yourself adds mystery for a woman and increases your attractiveness to her. Let her see you indifferent settings, formal, family gatherings, sports events, work socials and change up your clothing style for each event. Khakis and a t-shirt gets old really fast. Why not take her on a fancy dinner date dressed in a suit and a tie? All women find a man in a suit attractive! It is also paying her a compliment that you made the effort.

Hygiene also plays an essential part in what women find attractive in men. It is non-negotiable. Shower at least daily, and shampoo and condition your hair every day or at least every second day. Women love to smell fresh hair. In fact women are more sensitive to smell than men so take care of body odor with regular deodorant and try splashing on some aftershave or cologne. She will be falling over you! If you don’t like it every day, save it for special date nights and she will appreciate the gesture. For a special touch take her shopping and let her choose the cologne she likes the best on you. And on the topic of hygiene don’t forget to brush your teeth, morning and night. There is nothing more unattractive than bad breath and broken teeth. It is an easy habit to cultivate, along with some regular lip balm to keep your lips soft and conditioned. You will thank yourself for the effort when you are in the middle of a passionate kiss. Breath mints are easy to carry with you and she will appreciate the effort.

Keep in mind that women are detail oriented and when you make an effort with details, she notices! It shows you are in tune to her wants and desires.

Other things that raise your attractiveness are paying wholehearted sincere compliments. In the heart of every woman is a Cinderella fantasy. Try painting pictures with your compliments and watch how it affects her. “You smell as fresh as a sea breeze.” To you it might sound corny, but women think in pictures and it will open heart wide.

Don’t forget, romantic gestures go a long way to increasing your attractiveness. Flowers, candles, chocolates, special dates, quite frankly women can’t get enough of this.

A good sense of humor is something else that can be developed (see the article how to make a girl laugh) that will cause your attractiveness to sky rocket in a woman’s opinion. And while you tell those jokes, look her in the eye and give her a genuine smile and you will light up her heart.

Be passionate about life, passionate about your job, passionate about your relationship. Find something to be passionate about even if it is developing new video games. That passion will draw her and intrigue her and cause her to want to get to know you better. That is the ultimate truth if you want to know What Women Find Attractive.

Cheers,

Brad Clooney

What Women Find Attractive 

How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone

The first step in How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone is to ask yourself why you ended up there in the first place. Now it may be you genuinely did not have romantic feelings for this person in the first place and that is fine. Some great relationships can grow out of friendships. But it is not the norm! First impressions count and as a general rule of thumb you should start out how you intend to continue in a relationship. Committing yourself to asking someone on a date is risky, but it sets the tone from the beginning that you have a romantic interest in this person, and gives you both the chance to be on the same page from the beginning. Continue reading to find out exactly How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone.

Was it your choice to be friends and if so, why? Perhaps you have been unclear of whether you two would be a good fit romantically. It can help to write out a list of ten qualities (no more) that you really want in a romantic partner and then choose the three qualities you can’t live without. You can review and change the list at any time, but knowing what you are looking for will make it much easier in the future to recognize what opportunities you want to go for, when possible romantic partners cross your path. It will give you courage to go after what you really want and avoid the confusion that the friend zone can bring.

If you are honest with yourself and recognize you are afraid of commitment, it would be worth working on some of your issues before attempting the transition of your friendship into something more meaningful, because if things go well, the next stage of your relationship will involve a greater commitment. You could start out by committing to a pet, something as small as a goldfish can help develop responsibility and the idea of having someone (or something) else’s interests at heart.

Now to help you prepare for the moment where you are going to make your move, you can start by taking some risks in other areas of your life first to build up your courage. How about sky diving? Paragliding? A trip to some place new? These mini experiences will build your confidence and set the stage for moving out of the friend zone.

The second step is you need to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. How is this revelation going to affect them? Have they given you any indications they share your feelings? If so, great. If not, it might be wise to put some feelers out there. Are you friends with their other friends? Try and find out casually if they have mentioned being interested in anyone. (You don’t want to find out they are actually in a relationship you didn’t know about when you make your move). Be assured, it will filter back to them that you were asking, and work in your favor. It might even open the conversation for you to make your move then and there, but at the least it will awaken their curiosity.

Do they have a favorite activity like ice skating? Planning a date around an activity they enjoy shows you know them and is going to give you an edge over other people who haven’t built that friendship first. If there is something they always wanted to do, plan this as a surprise date. Even if they don’t reciprocate the romantic feelings they will appreciate the gesture.

Bringing flowers, or a single flower to the date is a gesture that will drop a major clue you have romantic interest in your friend. Try and keep the gesture small but thoughtful, remember you don’t want to overwhelm them on the first date, but you do want to make it clear you are ready to change tracks and have a romantic interest in them. It is better to be more obvious in your gestures so there is no mistaking your intentions, because half-heartedness or being too subtle is only going to create confusion and awkward embarrassing tension between you.

Now, bonding takes place through shared experiences. If you have ever watched the Bachelor, you’ll notice they plan impressive dates, and with the individual dates, it usually has a meaningful personal twist. Sharing a helicopter ride, a tour of a new place or city, a hot air balloon ride or other adrenaline type activity, something outside of the everyday routine, will help you bond over a new experience together. Don’t feel pressured that it has to be something big, because the most important aspect is going to be the talk, but be aware if you have been friends a long time, you may need to make a big effort to show your interest has switched to a romantic interest and that you are serious and ready to commit if they are willing.

Next comes the face to face talk. Forget the laziness of texting, emailing, or sending the message through a mutual friend or third party. This is the time to man or woman up and give your friend the respect of face to face communication.

You could plan the elaborate ploy of a blind date, or some other white lie to get them there (as long as it is harmless), or you could describe the date you have planned, watching for their reaction and then reveal you would like them to be your date. If you have chosen something they enjoy, it will be easier for them to say yes.

Be prepared for shock, confusion, emotion, embarrassment or reactions such as silly giggling. The Worst case scenario of How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone is they may turn hostile if they don’t enjoy surprises being sprung on them. Hopefully you know your friend well and where they stand on surprises before you spring this on them. When people don’t know how to respond, they may laugh, or cry, or simply flee. Don’t take it personally but seize the moment and tell them clearly and concisely (don’t quote a Shakespearean sonnet) how you feel about them. Let them know your feelings have changed and choose a few qualities you love about them as a sincere compliment. Most important is to just be honest and vulnerable in this moment. Resist the temptation to put too much pressure on them. Your only goal right now is to win them over for the first date. If all goes well you can ask for a second date.

Remember when learning How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone if you are rejected, your friendship is going to take a knock. Back off for a while and give them some space and allow them to make the next move. But put your shoulders back and hold your head high because you had the courage to be true to your heart.

Cheers,

Brad Clooney

How to Get Out Of the Friend Zone